Friday, September 01, 2006

25 Signs your hearing a lie

25 Signs You're Hearing a Lie
Whether it's your spouse, your boss, or your child, it's possible to determine if that person is lying to you just by carefully watching for clues.
According to Sheri and Bob Stritof, authors of "Your Guide to Marriage" on About.com, there are specific verbal and nonverbal clues we all give when we tell a fib. While few people would exhibit all of these, it's the rare person who can tell a lie and not exhibit some of them!

25 signs to tell if someone is lying to you:

01. Touching the chin or rubbing the brow
02. Crossed arms or legs
03. Playing with hair
04. A line of perspiration on the brow if it isn't a warm day
05. Saying "no" several times
06. Continually denying accusations
07. Being extremely defensive
08. Providing more information and specifics than necessary
09. Inconsistencies in what is being shared
10. Body language and facial expressions don't match what is being said
such as saying "no," but nodding the head up and down
11. Smugness
12. Placing a barrier, such as a desk or chair, in front of self
13. Uncommon calmness
14. Unwillingness to touch spouse during conversation
15. Being hesitant
16. Slouching posture
17. Rigidity or fidgeting
18. Differing behaviors; not acting in a usual fashion
19. Unnatural or limited arm and hand movements
20. Partial shrug
21. Lack of finger pointing
22. Unusual voice fluctuations, word choice, sentence structure
23. Stalling the conversation by repetitive use of pauses and comments like
"um" or "you know"
24. Lack of use of contractions; prefers emphasizing "not" when talking
25. Avoidance of eye contact, eyes glancing to the right, staring past you,
or turning away from you while talking

The Stritofs note that it is quite possible to mistake nervousness or distraction for lying or for misreading or mislabeling your spouse's behaviors.

What do you do if you think you're being told a lie by someone who is close to you? Ask questions. Ask for clarification. Trust your gut.

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